The art of being nice… to pregnant women

[Initially published on Jan 2, 2017.]

I am usually not a nice person. I am sarcastic, straight-forward and, mostly, just not nice. I don’t appreciate people that have a tendency to embellish everything they say to make their point more appealing to the masses. But well, I still listen to them. I am just not like that.

Me and little L by Camilla Jørvad.

Or I wasn’t… Until I became a mom. The truth is throughout my pregnancy, I was over-flooded with words of empathy, smiles and even messages from long-gone acquaintances. This cloud of kindness mixed with the overload of hormones in my body took me by surprise. I was not ready, but I was enjoying it.

One of the most remarking changes was my excessive use of exclamation marks!!! So many and so out-of-context sometimes. This together with my lack of a proper language now (mixing Portuguese, English and Danish at home on a daily basis) makes me having a meltdown every time I need to read what I wrote.

And it changed me. Slowly, but surely. The fact that little L was growing day by day inside me and everyone was being extra nice to me turned me into this cheesy, messy mom. And you know what? I like it!

But of course I am still myself. I keep having these awkward moments with random people, I keep bumbling nonsense, which pretty much tells me I am still myself - a non-person person.

So, my question is: is this a general pattern or is every recent parent in this somewhat nicer version of her/himself?

Social media addiction

[Initially published on Dec 1, 2016.]

The digital era is here to stay. No matter how much I try to avoid it, I end up using it every day. However, it is time to slow down. I need some change.

The butterfly effect at Copenhagen Botanical Garden.

The more the digital world is taking over, the more I feel trapped in it. Times are changing and I sure see how useful the World Wide Web is. But does it really pay off? I remember looking for articles about certain motherhood issues on a daily basis when little L was born. Or the Facebook groups I join and feel somewhat grateful for. Or the endless hours of YouTube videos that taught me so much - from coding to cooking to exercising.

It is like we have this constant - and very recent - need to share what we experience as if it makes it more real, when in fact it doesn’t. It is like we, as humans, are evolving a new instinct - the need to pleasure ourselves appreciation from others (with likes and followers). I am no different. Guilty as charged.

Let’s look at Facebook, for instance. I joined it in 2008 after a few weeks of my moving to Norway. Almost no one had it in Portugal. I joined because I was getting to know people from all over the world and all sorts of events were announced and shared there. I only posted a picture of myself 5 years later, and it was not a clear one - only those that really knew me could recognise me. I wanted to avoid posting anything personal for as long as I could.

It was only when I bought my first smart phone, in 2013, that I joined Instagram. This is by far my favourite platform. It provided me my daily dose of artistic inspiration. It feeds my artist-wannabe-persona and I simply cannot get enough. So, back in 2013, I obviously started merging both Instagram and Facebook, which annoyed some people.

Fast-forward to 2015, and my countdown-to-birth posts made it more appealing to family, friends and Facebook-acquaintances. I obviously wanted to avoid posting pictures of my daughter at all costs, but family and friends pressure took over and now my social media is a complete mess and I am not proud of it.

So this December, I am ending my personal Facebook account. Facebook would go back to be a platform for USEFUL information, instead of a thread of selfies, trolls, flashy media articles, and the like. I am done, folks!
But this is just a step! My intention is to declutter my life style, be more in sync with nature, and be more present for my daughter, my husband, my family and my friends.

Every day of December will be used to clean something, even if it is perceived as something tiny. In the end, I will post what I ended up with. The goal is to adopt a more minimalistic life style.

Photoshoot with Camilla Jørvad Photography

[Initially published on Nov 13, 2016.]

These are not our wedding pictures. We just volunteered as models.

Around April this year, Camilla Jørvad was looking for couples for a photoshoot. Because I was just completely in love with her work - and still am -, I asked M if he was in (he is ALWAYS in for everything!!!), I contacted her and she said yes right the next day.

On October 23, we headed to the Scottish Highlands for the whole day. We got rain, wind, sun - the typical very predictable (NOT!!!) Scottish weather. Nothing that a warm cup of coffee and a slice of leftover cake couldn’t fix.

I don’t think she needs more introductions. You can visit her website, facebook, or instagram.

I do not like to share this much of us, but her work needs to be seen.

Thank you so much for this day, Camilla!

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